Dear Internet,

Dear Internet

Please blow up all websites that have audio on autoplay.

Thanking you in anticipation

Vanessa

Dear internet...

agsystems:

next time you feel like resizing my browser window without asking me first, don’t. If you do I’m gonna chop your legs off.

Dear Internet,

Could someone do a remix of the There Will Be Blood preview set to AC/DC’s If You Want Blood?

Love,

Jared 

Dear Internet,

Please post that old Saturday Night Live sketch about “Blossom” where Sara Gilbert says “Those aren’t condoms…they’re balloons…for a party!”

Because I think about it often.

— dalasverdugo

:)

Dear ninjabot,

On behalf of the internet, we accept your apology. Your next year schedule is as garbage as this years (except for the game where USC (the team that should be national champions this year) will destroy you) but it gets better the year after that.

Ohio state is good football, but I’m allowed to hate you guys when you (barely) beat ASU in it’s second only rose bowl appearance in 1997. :(

But here’s to College Football, the best sport on God’s green earth! What an interesting year it was this year.

Yours,
livejamie

:(

Dear Internet,

Please tell livejamie that I am sorry. The SEC appears to be the stronger conference. I can only hope that the experiences of this year will help to build a stronger buckeye team next year. Then, after that, we can lose all of our good seniors again and have another shit season!

Yours,

ninjabot

Dear Internets

You have solved many of my problems, yet you catered to me so nicely you have left me wanting more. While I’m sure you’re capable of doing so many unheard of future ideas, for some reason you’re diversifying and leaving me feeling confused and over logged-in.

I want to thank you for social networking and allowing me to be a citizen of transparency, however I’m one of those pesky vanity users. I have domains, a certain specific personal branding that leaves me feeling spread about rather comforted. I’m smarter than the average AOL mom, and while I’m not busy trying to run my own webserver I am trying to do a million things throughout your tubes and I have one request.

Instead of catering to specific audiences, media or service how about you cater to me via that link? You really have to do no more than what you’re already doing, you just have to give me more freedom with it. I’m willing to pay you for that extra leniency even if I’m already paying for your space and time.

I don’t want to be attentionwhore.org or courtneyjohnston.net, flickr.com/photos/attentionwhore, vimeo.com/courtneyjohnston, linkedin.com/in/courtneyjohnston, myspace.com/attnwhore, facebook.com/profile.php?id=621256198, or last.fm/user/attnwhore/.

What if I was courtneyjohnston.net/flickr or courtneyjohnston.net/linkedin? What if every service I used allowed me to integrate their services into the domain of my choice and allowed me to present my data in the exact way I wanted it shown down to the exact letter spacing? (Thank you tumblr)

I don’t mean just make multiple pages and use rss feeds. Without duplicating any of my data and allowing me to stay a part of their network while also routing people to my specific area. I’m not a fan of the same picture or post showing up in 4 different locations on 4 different servers just to be connected to my profile somehow.

I guess that’s all it is really; I just don’t want a profile. I want to be my own profile and handle my presentation using the exact format I want.

I’m already willing to pay flickr $24.99 a year just to host my images and give me an okay organizational interface. My spending for all of my regularly used services would probably far outweight whatever myspace and facebook are getting in ad revenue from me and my profiles. Give me EASY access to make everything cohesive in MY way and you’ll be giving me my ideal internet experience. And I’ll probably be giving you back a few hundred a year for the love.  — courtneyj

Dear Internet, Firefox handles memory better than you think

Not a week goes by when I don’t hear someone say or write:

“Firefox sucks, it’s full of memory leaks, I have to restart it like every few hours!!!1”

Then we engage in a complex computer science-y analysis of what exactly is behind this. Bad programming? Feature bloat? Mozilla sold out to Microsoft?

Few realize that Firefox’s ability to open many many tabs, not Firefox’s memory handling, is what’s responsible for these “issues”.

Before Firefox, you were forced to keep your IE/etc windows lean because having 15 of them open cluttered up everything and made the machine you were using useless.

With Firefox, that’s no longer a problem as they sit neatly in your single window. Except that they still demand plenty of memory, CPU and other resources because they are fine & capable browser windows containing lots of flash, images and text… which leads us to this “memory issue”.

Yes, keep less tabs open and you will find Firefox surprisingly efficient.

Yours truly,

Common Sense

— fascinated

Dear Internet,

At what age does it become unseemly to have multiple, concurrent internet crushes? I sincerely hope the answer is a number higher than 32, else I shall be quite embarrassed.

Sincerely,

J.

— ofvarieddelights